Patron of the Arts

I would like to tell you a story. One day I saw these colorful and cheap paintings in someone's kitchen on Design Sponge (incidentally, our kitchen is also painted that exact shade of yellow). So I looked up the artist, Steve Keene, and found out that he paints assembly-line style, and has made over 140,000 paintings to date. He also sells 5 paintings "that kind of range from large to medium" for only $21. SOLD!

A few weeks later, nothing had arrived, so I was beginning to wonder if I had fallen for some sort of scam. Then the doorbell rang. Jason went downstairs, and came back up with this.

Yeah. Looks like a lot more than 5 paintings, huh? So I started unwrapping layer upon layer of plastic wrap and brown paper. It was at this point that Jason asked me if I had bought a brick of marijuana. (We've been watching a lot of Border Wars lately.)

All told, I unwrapped 29 paintings. You read that right: twenty-nine. What am I going to do with 29 paintings? Especially ones that have zero straight sides and are made of heavy plywood scraps. Here's one with the cat for scale:

For now, they are sitting in grocery bags until I come up with a plan. Which I will do while hanging out in my house which has been hovering around this temperature (on the left):